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Great Moments in Facebook History: January 27th, 2014

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Monday, January 27th, 2014:

  • Question:  The more stuff you have on your laptop (music, pictures, documents) does it make your laptop heavier?
  • Well, now that I’m stuffed and, lets face it, a little tipsy, I’m off to babysit for the night.
  • There’s a 1920s themed party today, but since the Chinese Exclusion Act was enforced at the time, I’m not gonna go
  • “Locked out of the house.  Thank God I can still connect to the wifi.” – This is the most teenage post I’ve seen all day.
  • Everyone always says not to go to the grocery store hungry.  How come no one ever told me not to go to the liquor store angry?
  • To the girl who stole the grenadine bottle from behind the bar and drank half of it: Grenadine is not alcoholic.  It is a fancy cordial.  I knew who you were at the end of the night.  You had it all over your mouth area.  You cost us, I estimate, $2.  You probs put on 600 calories in pure sugar.  Thanks for the laughs.
  • “Maybe it’s not always about trying to fix something that’s broken.  Maybe it’s about starting over and creating something better…” – And that’s why you have a younger brother.
  • No need to drive me crazy.  I can walk from here.
  • Nobody talks about how Eve screwed the first guy she ever met…
  • Sometimes Canadians fistfight over who is more sorry.
  • Winter needs to calm the eff down.
  • Our kids biggest challenge will be to find a username that’s not already taken.
  • Quot posting pictures of your ultrasounds.  We get it.  You’re a sex haver.
  • I’m high as a kite!  Let me rephrase that: I’m stuck in a tree.

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