Great Moments in Facebook History: January 8th, 2014

Here are the BEST great moments in Facebook history for today, Wednesday, January 08, 2014:

• Nobody can MAKE the Yuletide gay. It's not a choice. That's how it was born.
• Hey self-appointed MILFs, easy does it. We'll let you know.
• My penis wears a tin foil hat, to block the thoughts from my brain.
• There are two types of people in this world and it is easily determined by what they do when an ice cube falls on the floor.
• The bouncer at the club calls me kevin mcallister because I'm always going home alone
• The only way I know if I've bought enough beer is if my car thinks I have a passenger
• My phone just auto-corrected, 'calendar' to 'cake radar' and now I really wish I had that.
• You know you've found the one when they don't mind if you fart in front of them. Which is why no one on this elevator can be my girlfriend.

(Found on Status Stalker, Funny Status, and Failbook)