Great Moments in Facebook History: July 8, 2016

Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, I scour the interwebs to find the best (and worst) thoughts floating around social media. Without further ado…

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Friday, July 8th, 2016:

Had to get rid of my memory foam mattress. It threatened to start talking....
I don't wanna get too political here, but I plan on voting for whichever candidate will do something about Meghan Trainor.
Once you realize that you don’t need a special occasion to buy a cake, the second part of your life begins.
You know how all of Jupiter’s moons are named after his lovers and affairs. Yeah. NASA is sending a craft to check up on Jupiter. You know what the craft is called? JUNO. Who’s Juno? JUPITER’S WIFE. NASA IS SENDING JUPITER;S WIFE TO CHECK ON JUPITER AND HIS AFFAIRS AND LOVERS.
So the presidential election is between a grandma who can't figure out her email and a grandpa who believes every spam he receives? Great.