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Great Moments in Facebook History: March 5th, 2014

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Wednesday, March 5th, 2014:

  • Sleep is like sex, you never get enough of it and sometimes it feels like it never happened at all.
  • Finding out your ex got fat is like finding 20 bucks in your pocket. Not life changing but definitely puts a smile on your face.
  • Never trust a married guys opinion of who’s hot. It’s like asking a starving guy what food tastes good.
  • The secret to a successful lemonade stand is vodka.
  • When a guy texts a girl “hey stranger”, what he really means is “I’ve recently thought about trying to get in your pants again.”
  • I mixtape love you.
  • My favorite Transformer is Amazon Prime.
  • It’s so cold outside I just saw Richard Simmons wearing pants.
  • We were like bum drunk…like lower wacker drive drunk…

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