Great Moments in Facebook History: November 10, 2014

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Monday, November 10th, 2014:

• Facebook just suggested I be friends with my ex. I marked it ‘Offensive’
• When your ex texts you after months with, “Hey… what’s up?”  Not today, Satan.  Not today.
• Treat your woman like you treat your smartphone: touch her often, stare at her, and make her the most important thing in your life.
• Does anyone else leave Best Buy without buying anything and think the security guy at the front suspects you of stealing...so you go out of your way to act friendly toward him?
• “That microwavable meal was delicious and filling!” - no one ever
• Technically, there is a lot of food in this house. However, none of it is sweet or microwavable. There is no food in this house.
• Do crabs think that fish can fly?
• A girl drinks 4 cosmos over a span of 60 minutes. 25 mins later, she texts 3 of her besties. How many emojis will she use? Show your work.
• If Milli Vanilli were to fall in the woods, would someone else make a sound?

(Found on Funny Status)