Great Moments in Facebook History: September 15, 2014

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Monday, September 15th, 2014:

• The people naming dinosaurs should teach the people naming hurricanes how to name stuff.
• I go into Best Buy and ask "Where are your most expensive yet least guarded items?" Then someone is always nearby when I have questions.
• I don't go on a date until at least the third sex.
• Just once I want my boss to assume I'm tired in the morning because I fight crime all night, not because of all the booze I drank.
• The coolest thing about being a dog must be the ability to use your own ass for a pillow.

(Found on Status Stalker and Funny Status)