Great Moments in Facebook History: September 2, 2015

Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, I scour the interwebs to find the best (and worst) thoughts floating around social media. Without further ado…

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Wednesday, September 2nd, 2015:

It really bothers me when people use song lyrics as their status... It makes me wanna SHOUT!!! SHOUT!!! let it all out... These are the things I can do without, so come on... I'm talking to you, so come on!!!
OK. So I danced like no one was watching. Anyone know a good lawyer?
I'd have sex with Martha Stewart just for the amazing breakfast she would make the next morning.
Why hasn't Head and Shoulders shampoo come out with a body wash called "Knees and Toes"?
I haven't heard anything about Farmville lately. Did those guys sell out to Monsanto?
If you're an astronaut and you don't end every relationship by saying "look, I just need space" then you're wasting everyone's time.