Would You Rather Fight a Hundred Spider-Sized Puppies, or One Puppy-Sized Spider?

So, a guy named Piotr Naskrecki was walking through the rainforest in Guyana, one evening... like you do... when he heard something creeping underfoot.  From the sound of it, he expected to see a rat or a possum when he flipped on his flashlight.  No reason was given as to why, in God's name, he wasn't already USING his flashlight while walking... in the dark... through the rainforests of Guyana.  But... I digress...

What did he see gingerly strolling next to him on the forest floor when his path was illuminated?  Was it a baby monkey?  Nope!  Was it a big tree frog?  Nah-uh.

Was it a puppy-sized spider?  Give that man a cigar!!!

He was so taken aback by his discovery, that he just couldn't keep it to himself.

How kind of him.

Without further ado, Mr. Naskrecki brings to you Theraphosa blondi, also known as South American Goliath birdeater.