Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, I scour the interwebs to find the best (and worst) thoughts floating around social media.  Without further ado…

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Friday, May 1, 2015:

  • Someone told me if I cut out a piece of my carpet it would grow back.  I did this 2 days ago and it hasn’t, yet.  Do I have to do anything special to make it grow?  My mom is going to kill me if it doesn’t grow back soon.  Thx.
  • Cereal is the sweatpants of food.
  • "Teeter Totter" is the silliest name for toddler catapults.
  • You’re not a foodie.  You’re 24.  You went to a restaurant.
  • I don't have time to tell you how wrong you are. But I'm going to anyway because it will bug me if I don't.
  • Why do we even have gendered deoderants?  If I’m a grown-ass man and I want to smell like Cocoa Butter Kiss, then I effing will.
  • Teacher told me to turn in my essay.  But I ain’t no snitch.

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Found on Status Stalker, Funny Status, Postrandomonium, Failbook)

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