Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Wednesday, April 2, 2014:

  • That moment when your roommate has been chatting with a girl on a dating website and making plans to meet her, when he looks up and asks, "what is a transsexual?"
  • I wish I had somebody to blame all of my problems on, like my wife does.
  • Turns out, I'm not an afternoon person either...
  • Technically, every picture is a before picture.
  • To find out your cat name, pick any name at random and refuse to answer to it.
  • Parenting tip: if you beat one child with the other child you can tell people they were just fighting. You're welcome.
  • Just paid for lunch with dimes and nickels, in case anyone needs a financial advisor.
  • For my bachelor party I want a cake that jumps out of another cake.
  • This bartender doesn't know it yet, but she is probably going to make me 36 hours late for work tomorrow.