Great Moments in Facebook History: August 25, 2014

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Monday, August 25th, 2014:

• Couples who sit side by side in a booth, but not because they are in love but because they are sick of each other faces
• The most common crossfit injury is a black eye from talking about it too much.
• Fear the man wearing velcro strapped sandals, for he has nothing left to lose.
• I thought she asked if I was interested in an orgy. Turns out she really said "4G." My apologies to the lady at the Verizon kiosk
• People who cook Hot Pockets in the oven, Where are you getting all this free time?
• My therapist thinks I have a God complex. How dare he say that unto me.
• Whenever I start to hate my job I think about the camera crew who has to follow the Kardashian's 24/7.
• Girl, you must be the ending of Donnie Darko cause I don't understand you

(Found on Status Stalker, Funny Status, and Failbook)