Great Moments in Facebook History: July 2, 2014

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Wednesday, July 2nd, 2014:

• Just witnessed a white girl take a selfie with her coffee in Starbucks. I always heard the legends but never thought I'd see it in the wild.
• Deja poo, the feeling that you've heard this crap before.
• Your kid is running around the store screaming at the top of his lungs annoying everyone and I’m the jerk for tripping him??
• I’m filthy rich. 50% of this is true.
• Oh you're a soccer fan? Okay then name 5 of their albums. Yeah. That's what I thought.
• I’d never slip a roofie in your unattended drink. I’m broke. I’m going to drink your unattended drink.
• So say some animals *were* injured in the making of a film. Is that listed in the credits or what? “Bob hurt one bird. He’s very sorry.”
• Perhaps if we started calling birth control pills, bullets for pregnancy self defense they'd be more open to them
• Barbie has an awful lot of things for a girl who's knees don't bend.

(Found on Status Stalker, Funny Status, and Failbook)