Yesterday they were driving for Uber. Now they're a cryptocurrency financial analyst?

An overnight, instant crypto-expert.

An insta-analyst.

For real?

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Bitcoin, Dogecoin, Ethereum, and every other type of cryptocurrency are all really super hot right now.

And by hot I mean volatile.

Unexpected changes in market sentiment can lead to sharp and sudden moves in price. It is not uncommon for the value of cryptocurrencies to quickly drop by hundreds, if not thousands of dollars. (CMC Markets)

It's like the stock market and gambling had a baby. A crazy, petulant, out of control, Tasmanian devil on a case of Redbull baby.

Like any baby, you have to keep an eye on it. According to all these new experts, if you would have invested X amount of dollars at the beginning you'd be swimming in a jacuzzi, no, an Olympic sized swimming pool full of money right now.

That's the thing about this wave of cryptocurrency crazies that gets me. I'm not talking about people I don't know. I'm talking about folks I run into everyday or friends of mine who are flooding my newsfeed with all their newfound knowledge and expertise.

See like that.

Riddle me this oh financial guru. Where are your millions of dollars? And if you got so rich, why are you still here slumming with us other poor clowns who didn't do like you and invest and blah, blah, blah?

Dude up above personally invested $250K? Yet you're still here looking like you're playing Call Of Duty.

How about this...

Stevie Wonder can see that this is fake right? It's not just me is it?

Just because you can throw around the words does not make you an expert.

Photo by Hitesh Choudhary on Unsplash
Photo by Hitesh Choudhary on Unsplash


I get it. You're excited. You're in on a hot new financial trend. You might have invested and made a little bit of money.

But you are not a financial wiz nor expert because of that. And constantly posting about it nonstop on social media isn't going to convince me either.

Bruh...I know what you did for a living just a few weeks ago. How'd you go from part-time stocker at a grocery store and your budding hip hop career to BONAFIDE CRYPTOCURRENCY GURU in a matter of weeks?

Why is the same dude in the barber shop week after week telling everyone who will listen that they are missing out if they don't get on board now?

Talking to people like they are idiots and suckers because they don't understand and don't get it.

What I don't get is if you did what you are suggesting we do and YOU made all that money...WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?

Shouldn't you be in Aruba or something instead of Crypto-shaming me?

Dude, the exit is that way. Go over there.

I hear Elon is outside giving away Teslas, trips to Mars, and Bitcoin if you share this post.

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