A Couple Of Things We Need To Invent Right Now

I'm at my best inventing stuff when I'm annoyed by things. Things that most people should know better than to do. Like talking really loud on their Bluetooth in public.  Really don't care to hear your conversation about what so-and-so said to you when you told her she needed to get her act together.  How about you AND so-and-so STFU.

With that annoyance in mind, here are the results of my most recent invention brainstorming session:

Parking Line Spikes-

The sharp razor-edge spikes would be placed just under the surface of painted lines in a typical parking lot. Then, when Mr. Entitled with the Range Rover parks across two parking spots at say Wal-Mart for instance, the spikes would be set to go off and puncture the tires to his majesties $80,000 douche carriage.  Watch how fast those who think they're entitled act after having to purchase a couple of tires at said Wal-mart.

A Hard Plastic Sealed Club-

To beat the person who decided that a dollar store toy needed to be wrapped in the hardest, tightest, vacuum sealed plastic ever invented by man. I think its important in order to save a life, that the club come in this same type of packaging. The thought being, that maybe because it takes so long to free the product from its vice-like plastic grip, that you may forget why you even initially bought the club in the first place.

Shoes With A Dog S**t Alarm-

I gave up on trusting anyone to pick up after their dog so why not get all pro-active with Dog S**t Alarm Shoes.  Imagine your shoes using echolocation like a bat.  Helping you avoid pile after pile of rovers heaping dung mess. At this point, after stepping in some yesterday, I'd pay $100 for a pair.

Well there's three inventions that can make America better right now. You want to weigh in with some input please feel free. Just make sure you have a patent pending because I'm not above stealing an idea to move things along to immediately make our lives easier.