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Group Therapy: If Police Were Investigating a Crime at Your House, What’s the Most Embarrassing Thing They’d Find?

Our friends at posted the query to their users: What’s the most embarrassing thing the police would find if investigating your house?  Here are the eight best responses:

  • “I visited the country of Bhutan where the symbol of good luck is a penis.  I bought a hand-crafted black demon penis with wings attached.  It’s in my living room.”
  • “I’m ashamed they’d see my only furniture is an air mattress and a fold-out camping chair.  The police would assume the burglars stole my furniture.  Nope.
  • “I am a guy with a complete collection of all Britney Spears’ CDs.”
  • “My bowl of very dusty condoms.”
  • “If they used one of those CSI black lights, I can’t even imagine what they’d see.”
  • “I have something called poop scissors.  It’s because I have irregular bowel movements and only poop a few times a week, so they’re so big they clog the toilet every time and I need to use the scissors to chop them to get them down the pipes.”
  • “I have a backpack filled with old stuffed animals I hope to give my kids one day… but right now, I’m a single adult male.”
  • “Probably my homemade sex doll.”  Probably?

So… The Rocker Morning Show wants to know… if police were investigating a crime at your house, what’s the most embarrassing thing they’d find?

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