The Great Debate: Fall Vs. Autumn The Season Only Needs One Name
While most of the country will be focused on the presidential debates it has come to my attention that a more important debate is raging across the country and is currently being ignored. That would be ONE proper name for a season that segues Summer into Winter. A season that seems so pretentious with addressing itself under two names, that I find it hard to believe we as Americans haven't settled on just a one name season....you know, like the rest of the seasons in a year.
Get over yourself Fall/Autumn. You don't see Summer or Winter being addressed by two names, why should we address you as such?
Now as you would expect on such a controversial subject, the issue has angerly divided the country and I feel if we don't get this resolved soon, well, I'm not sure where we could end up. Secession of whole states? Divided tables at Thanksgiving dinners? Burning leaves in protest? My gawd man, this could result in pure pandemonium. We need to solve the issue now. Therefore I have arranged a debate to settle the issue once and for all-
So lets get started. First question in our debate goes to Fall:
Q: Why do you feel the season should be narrowed down to one named only after you?
Fall: Well quite frankly many people have told me that my title works out perfect as a transition piece between seasons as the season "Falls" between Summer and Winter. It's the greatest season when its called Fall.
Q: Same question to you Autumn:
Autumn: I will gladly explain why we need more dignity and sophistication brought back to this season...
Fall: In other words you're a pretentious a**
Autumn: I say...I will not tolerate this demeaning attitude and belittlement from a bully...
Fall: Ahhhh...shut it sleepy Fall. The season is the greatest when its named after me...
Autumn: You're out of touch Fall, Americans are tired of your rhetoric...it's time for change...
Well, so much for this debate to remain civil. How about you decide. Vote above on which name we should choose as Americans. While your voting think about this, at least we can count on both our local and national politicians to keep their honor and dignity in check when it comes to debating more important issues right? Lets thank them ahead of time for keeping a more serious composure when it comes to debating issues that involve our quality of life. Gotta love American politics.