Great Moments in Facebook History

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Monday, July 14th, 2014: I'll bet I'm the only one in this grocery with "sh*t for tacos" on my shopping list. If I'm in your house and you have bookshelves... Be prepared to see me turning statues and bending down books while looking for your lair ... Read More ...

Here are the BEST Great Moments in History for today, Friday, July 11th, 2014: The best password cracking software is called a pissed off ex. I should win an Academy Award for every time I pretend to not see someone I know in public. If the voices in my head had a British accent I would listen to them more often ... Read More ...

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Wednesday, July 9th, 2014: How many goals did the Germans score? A Brazilian! I copied my Match.com bio from a used car website. White – Good condition – Reliable – Cheap – No evidence of rear end damage ... Read More ...

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Monday, July 7th, 2014: Happy 4th of July or as dogs call it, The Purge I think I bought just enough fireworks to get my neighbor to move. Why do we use fireworks to celebrateAmerica ... Read More ...

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Wednesday, July 2nd, 2014: Just witnessed a white girl take a selfie with her coffee in Starbucks. I always heard the legends but never thought I'd see it in the wild. Deja poo, the feeling that you've heard this crap before ... Read More ...

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Monday, June 30th, 2014: If you still pay for porn I just want you to know I have a butter churner and an abacus for sale. I carry a backpack full of receipts and gum wrappers and go through it while I'm at a cashier until someone who's frustrated pays for me ... Read More ...

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Friday, June 27th, 2014: Being a pizza delivery driver is great because literally no one is disappointed to see you. If you ever come over unannounced, it'll take me at least three minutes to answer the door because there is no way I was already wearing pants I have no problem texting while driving, but I won’t text while going down s

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Wednesday, June 25th, 2014: Password so strong it can say goodbye and never look back Don't getTOOdown on dudes for sending D pics. There was a rumor it worked once and, as a group, we have zero other good ideas ... Read More ...

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Monday, June 23rd, 2014: Does swimming in debt count as cardio? When I hear someone say, "chicken pot pie," I get excited three times. I believe in love at first episode ... Read More ...

Here are the BEST Great Moments in Facebook History for today, Friday, June 20th, 2014: For job interviews, your best bet is to dress as a pizza delivery person, march in and say "Who ordered DILIGENCE and ATTENTION TO DETAIL!?" Let me be clear, I don't want to die alone ... Read More ...